Thursday, May 8, 2008

Once Upon A Time

Dusting away the cobwebs of my mind's filing cabinet, I found a good story to tell you...

A long, long time ago (ok, it was actually 48 days ago) a handsome prince descended from an ancient rajasthani family in India decided to take a long sojourn to a far away land known as Ohakune to begin a new adventure. He packed up all his belongings, stole a beautiful princess from neighbouring lands and drove his rickshaw for hours and hours til he arrived at what appeared to be the ends of the earth. Here there were no people, no civilisations, and no showers or cooking apparatus.

Throwing the beautiful princess into a small floating vessel and ordering her to paddle, the two
set off to explore these unknown lands. For days and days they toiled down the mighty Whanganui River with only feral goats and the birds for company. However, after a bend in the river, they discovered all of the native inhabitants of this strange land were on the river for their annual Easter pilgrimage. Befriending two of the natives, Lucy and Ian, the prince and princess learned new and wondrous things. They found to truly survive such an arduous journey, one must take careful preparation beforehand in order to have at least two different flavours for every meal.

Suddenly, realising he had been slightly poisoned by his ev
il brother back at home, the handsome prince fell violently ill and began to desire his own cosy creature comforts. He lay down in the floating vessel and slept. Upon waking, his fairy godmother appeared and offered him a strong elixir, promising him the poison would slowly leak from his body through his nose. With many thanks, the prince and princess set off again down the churning river through rapids and whirlpools in their small, extremely-difficult-to-steer vessel.

They passed amazing sights such as the Bridge to Nowhere and set up camp in precarious places amongst the natives who seemed to think sandflies, hauling heavy barrels up steep hills and swimming in frigid water was great fun. The prince did note that the natives didn't smell nearly as bad as his beautiful princess did, having gone without bathing for so long.

At long last, the couple reached the end of their adventure and toppled out of their vessel, desirous of chocolate, Twizzlers and a hot shower. Looking to his princess with a wide smile on his face the prince said, "Well love, same time, same place next year?" The princess nodded gleefully and replied "you betcha, but next time you get to do all the paddling!"

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